If your nose doesn't fit, does it mean you're stupid or nuts?

Facial symmetry is the latest hot air to come out of psychologist's mouths. The BBC Online web site states, "Men with symmetrical faces are less likely to lose their memory and intelligence in later life, according to researchers." It begs the question: how d'you know that then? These psychologists who come up with this stuff must take us for mugs, pun very much intended.

This scientific mapping of the face looks something like the dot-to-dot pictures we used to get in comics as a kid. Frankly, I think this story belongs in a comic too.

How about measuring testicular symmetry in elderly gentlemen to determine the mental welfare of the individual? If testicular symmetry were found to be consistent and that said anatomical structures were indeed in the same horizontal plane, where the perpendicular aspect or each structure was equidistant from the centre of the phallus, what could we determine?

For fear of offending anyone, I will, in answering this highly important question, execute a long standing literary symbol to hide any rudeness or possible embarrassment. So, regarding mental welfare and testicular symmetry, I think it would be fair tosay we're dealing with aload of old b*****ks. Rather like the idea of facial symmetry linked to mental welfare.