D'you remember Road Runner? Doc, I think it's Wylie Coyote...

The Independent carried a story about the secrets of how to interpret the Rorschach test. The secrets were revealed after the ink spillages or whatever they're called and their interpretations, were posted on Wikipedia. According to Herman Rorschach, the intepretation of the splodges can tell what the person is thinking. Paddy Mac would like to ask: "How d'you know that then?"

It's yet another brilliant example of the make-it-up-as-you-go-along brigade claiming this and that when they have absolutely no idea. I guess I leave myself open on this one as any psychiatrist could come along and tell me I'm wrong, or that I'm not an expert in the field. Fine by me. What I could do is make up an equally stupid test and like Dr Rorschach, put it out there and tell others what they should think about this or that.

Then the shrinks out there could come and ask me, "How d'you know that then?" My answer: I made it up in my spare time so I could make a bit of beer money.

You're so clever doctor

Whenever there's a murder these days, the shrinks seem to get in on the action to give their opinion on what they think happened, and what they think the person was thinking when he or she was thinking about killing another person. Beats me why you need a psychiatrist for this.

The Independent covered the story of William Cranston, who said he "lost his rag" when he discovered his partner and best friend making love. Cranston killed Kay Morton, 39, with a single stab wound to the heart and knifed Paul Wilkins, 55, several times, severing one of his arteries.

The shrink involved was Dr Philip Joseph (left), who examined Cranston. Dr Joseph said Cranston had "...suffered "the ultimate betrayal" by Ms Morton, and that catching the pair having sex on the sofa where his son died was "the last straw". A psychiatric examination revealed he suffered a "catastrophic loss of self-control".

Now for Paddy Mac's evaluation of Dr Joseph's evaluation. Suffered the "ultimate betrayal." Most of us mortals could have told the court that and I for one wouldn't mind the cash that was handed over for that opinion.

The best bit though is the "psychiatric examination" to find out Cranston had a "catastrophic loss of self-control." What sort of psychiatric examination was that doc? Perhaps the very 'scientific' psychiatric examination went something like this:

Dr Joseph: "Tell me what happened Mr Cranston."

Mr Cranston: "I saw them having sex and I got mad."

Dr Joesph: "How did you feel?"

Mr Cranston: "I felt very angry."

Dr Joseph: "What happened then?"

Mr Cranston: "I felt myself losing control very quickly because I was so angry."

Dr Joseph: "What happened then?"

Mr Cranston: "I lost my self-control."

Dr Joseph: "What happened then?"

Mr Cranston: "It was a catastrophe. I killed them both when I lost control."

And this is how you can reach the very very very scientific psychiatric evaluation that Mr Cranston had a "catastrophic loss of self-control." Rocket science takes a back seat in comparison to this stuff.